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Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Porn – A Depressive or Incentive for Your Sex Life?


[Here's my article for this week's issue for The Concordian. My first time writing about something using actual opinions other than mine yay!]

Anxiety over the negative effects of extensive porn-watching is not something new, but it begs the question, what are the negative effects, if any?

A recent article in Men’s Health, “Is Porn Harmful?” linked watching porn with depression (in men) based on a study in Arkansas, but also found that porn was more commonly used when stressed or bored rather than lonely.

Telecommunications professor Byant Paul of Indiana University states that there definitely is a negative bias when presenting porn in the media, implying that there might be a positive light to consider.

Men’s Health’s article “Is Porn Bumming You Out?” explores this very subject. Duane McBride, Ph. D of Andrews University says that porn may be a cause of metal health problems because of the isolation it involves, but admits that there isn’t necessarily a correlation between the two. Rather, as the article’s writer Kiera Aaron puts it, “Porn might not cause isolation but rather be a symptom of isolation—meaning those who are already antisocial tend to rely more on pornography”.

So let’s look at porn in that positive light suggested by Paul while removing the isolation factor.

A Norwegian study observed relations between couples and porn habits. Hands down, the most dysfunctional relationships were the ones where only one member used it. Surprisingly the most satisfied couples were the ones who both incorporated it into their sex lives.

Why? Researchers found they were more capable communicating their fantasies to one another, experimenting, and being open minded when romping around the sheets.

A study done in the University of Denver also concluded that couples who are open about and even join the other in their X-Rated movie nights are more likely to keep relationships going strong.

To find out how Concordia’s students feel, The Concordian interviewed Chris Herbert* and Melissa Park*.

When asked if porn ever made them feel depressed, Park disagreed, but Herbert answered yes, and that he only watches it if in a good mood. “Masturbation is not substitute for actual sex,” he says, “and will often make me feel lonelier afterwards.”

They both agreed that porn was definitely a good educator and felt it never diminished their sex lives. If anything, Herbert says porn has helped him appreciate his partners more. “I’ve learned a lot about how much better real-life sex with a real person can be,” he added.

McBride of Andrews University addresses this opinion, stating, “Experts believe that face-to-face social interactions improve mood and perceptions of physical health while social isolation has the opposite effect”.

The application of the open-porn relationship expressed in the Norwegian survey, however, seems easier said than done.

“I’ve never watched porn on a regular basis with a partner,” says Herbert, although he adds that this was for no other reason than the fact that his partners were not interested in watching it. Park seconds the importance of the partner’s personal preference. “I’ve talked about it pretty openly with past partners,” she says, “but it really depends on how they feel about it.”

According to the studies, the bottom line seems to be intimacy and connection, something Herbert and Park both feel is most important as well. Herbert states, “My relationship with porn definitely affected myself personally, but never my relationships in a direct way.” He feels porn neither improves or diminishes his sex life, stating instead, “Chemistry and communication affect this much more than pornography ever could.”

Park’s experiences have been mixed among partners. “One boyfriend was really not cool with [porn],” she says. “Others were a lot more receptive and adventuresome.”

She ends optimistically, though, with a smile: “It’s all about communication.”

*For the privacy of the participants, names have been changed.

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